Is Shemale a Derogatory Term?
by Alec Jaye, Your Shemale Pick-Up Wingman
Jason asks, “is shemale a derogatory term?” He went on to explain that he met a beautiful trans woman at a local nightclub. While chatting with this woman everything was going great until Jason mentioned the word “shemale.” He didn’t mean anything bad. By using the wrong terminology his date was over before it began. The advice I’m about to give you may be one of the most important tips you ever receive regarding personal interaction with shemales and trans women.
“Never call a trans woman a shemale”
Just don’t do it. There are plenty of other ways to refer to her. Simply “she” and “her” are generally a safe choices. Don’t make it awkward. Just refer to her in female pronouns and she will share with you how she identifies if she chooses to do so. She might actually tell you that she’s a crossdresser, a transexual, a shemale, etc. Remember, the term shemale is used pretty much exclusively by workers in the sex industry such as escorts and porn stars.
You will likely find that the trans women who identify as transexual, crossdresser or transgender recoil at the term shemale. “Why” you might ask and I know it doesn’t seem like a big deal to you but try to imagine yourself in their situation for just a moment. They have to deal with all the societal judgment about their identity, which many consider to simply be a lifestyle choice. They have been judged, ridiculed, abused and cast out. The last thing they want is for their gender identity to be associated with sex workers. Once again, I realize you’re probably thinking, “what’s so wrong with sex workers?” Usually nothing, but it is a matter of perception and identity for these trans women.
Now, take this knowledge and spin it around! By showing that you understand and can empathize (to an extent) with her situation, you become less threatening and you get through the wall that she keeps up to protect her emotional well-being. I have found that trans women of all types respond much better once they let this guard down. That’s when she goes from being apprehensive to accepting your romantic advances. Excellent!
Now That You Know Shemale is a Derogatory Term…
Now you understand why many consider shemale a derogatory term and how to safely navigate that topic.
Don’t be the awkward guy that always says and does the wrong things! This is an important page so you might want to read it again and give some thought to my advice. I know you mean no disrespect by using the term shemale, but try to understand why she might. Go look at the local trans dating profiles to see if you spot any local shemale hotties. Then go read my pick-up tips article where to meet shemales. Everything here is absolutely free and knowing these nuances may make the difference between success and failure!
